Wedding season is upon us, which means Saturday evenings full of taffeta, tulle, and too many beers. We tear up as we watch our friends walk down the aisle, full of happiness and excitement for the new couple as we join in their celebration.
As a single girl attending weddings without a date, attention sometimes clings to your dating status. And God forbid you show up sans date after age 30! Inevitably, you end up being cornered to supply answers to any or all of these top five most awful questions to ask a single girl at a wedding:
5. When’s it going to be your turn?
Does anyone actually think the person they are asking knows the answer to this question? I’m currently taking any suggestions of smart-ass-without-being-mean responses to use. And really start to appreciate the open bar at this point in the evening.
4. Don’t worry, when you stop looking the right guy will come along!
Oh. Ok. So I’ll just be over here at the bar then. Here I am. At the bar. NOT LOOKING. Just hanging out trying to think of a smart-ass response to your first question.
3. Are you looking? Because you really should be putting yourself out there if you want to find anyone.
I’m so confused. Isn’t this opposite of what that other person said? Bartender? Help.
2. I just let that cute single groomsman know that you are available and looking. I bet he comes over here any second!
Oh dear God. If that doesn’t scream desperate, I don’t know what does. Not to mention that by now I’m on my third glass of wine so if the super cute and single groomsman does happen to make his way over here, I’m toast as soon as I open my mouth. Someone hide me.
1. Wait, isn’t that your third piece of cake?
Ok. My single status you can question all night. But chocolate cake consumption?
Now you’ve gone too far.